Retreat and Treatment
Retreat, spiritually means, temporarily removing oneself from one's usual environment in order to become immersed in a particular subject matter.
Was it a retreat, or was it a leadership training? It was both...
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22 May
I was as usual, doing my job as a monitor. I didn't expect God (I didn't believe He exists anyway, or probably I did, but I ignored) would put everything in time. I bumped into Mrs. Ng, don't worry, I didn't literally bump into her. She threw at me that I went blur when she invited me for the camp. I was completely blank and my head nodded. Then when she left me standing there blur, I came to realise, "Where is the camp? How much?!"
With questions, here I am again in CF, it was Lilian's birthday. At the end of CF, Daniel told "EVERYONE" the camp is FREE! and it will be in PD, to your shock 29 to 31 May.
23 May
Oh toot! Meeting on 29 and 30. Camp is off my mind. Have to call them to cut my name off the list. Eh? Why can't I reach anybody?!
26 May
Again in the office. "Kar Wai, are you going to the retreat?" I shoke "Why not?! I've already book your place and paid for your deposit." (Was she asking whether I'm going or telling me that I'm going?!) "Huh?! Wah! Ok-lah, I'm going!"
This involves money you know? As a responsible MAN, I have to go!
Matthew 19:27 "We have left everything to follow you! What then will there be for us?"
29 May
1 a.m
Revelation, so this is indeed a leadership training camp. Can I, am I able to be a Christian leader? Come on, I have twisted faith, twisted philosophy and twisted me! Oh God, you must be kidding!
2 a.m.
ZzzzZZz
6 a.m.
Felt reluctant. Wearing those blue appaulets are burdening. and so does the works. I've never rested since then. Running here and there, doing this and that. I'm so tired, but I have to keep myself strong.
1.30 p.m.
Departure. Sleep....
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I really didn't expect all these. It was spontaneous. I only had a backpack. 3 sets of clothings, toothbrush, a pair of shoes and me! RM150 with bed, pillow and 6 MEALS a day! This is, man! Luxurious!
Throughout the camp, I was loud, boastful because something drove me to take over and to be recognised. Until that I even said something that I wouldn't normally speak!
I wanted to protect myself, I wanted to be recognised, so no one can ever hurt me again.
Have you ever feel that you're completely broke down and yet you feel so uplifted?
Why do I have to live up to other's expectation? Why do I need to put on stronghold within myself? Why do I trust only in myself?
I have limited strength and ability, many things are impossible for me, yet I did it on my own and failed miserably.
I don't have to be. I always say I'm a leader, I should not show any weakness. But yet, I'm the weakest. I thought I'm a good leader, the truth is, I'm the worst. Who said so? God says so!
As a leader, I did not leave any legacy because I did everything on my own. I didn't trust anybody. Which makes me feel sorry for Alvin for he struggled through his time as my succesor.
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This camp was more than what I can ever expect. I spent 3 digits in my saving account but I gained lessons of my life! Transformed me completely!
I thank God for everything, for His timing, for His amazing plan. I'm before His presence again!
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O Father in Heaven, I can't praise You even more O Father. Thank You for Your mercy and grace, thank You for blessing me with such wonderful people around me, thank You for bringing me back to You LORD, thank You for putting me through all these and thank You for proving me wrong! Father keep me strong in faith, keep me alert and watch against the evils O Father. I pray in Jesus name that You will gaurd us Father and protect us, for we are vulnerable as we gave up our stronghold and completely trust in You O Father. Arm us O Father and we are ready as your warriors O Father. Calm the storms O Father, as we start fishing people O my LORD!
Help those who are weak O Father, give them glory. Save those who are humble, let them shine O Father.
Help me in my path O Father, that the path I walk I walk in Jesus O Father! I love You Abah!
In Jesus' amazing name, Amen!
Job 6:24:"Teach me, and I will be quiet; show me where I have been wrong."
Was it a retreat, or was it a leadership training? It was both...
*****************************************************************************************
22 May
I was as usual, doing my job as a monitor. I didn't expect God (I didn't believe He exists anyway, or probably I did, but I ignored) would put everything in time. I bumped into Mrs. Ng, don't worry, I didn't literally bump into her. She threw at me that I went blur when she invited me for the camp. I was completely blank and my head nodded. Then when she left me standing there blur, I came to realise, "Where is the camp? How much?!"
With questions, here I am again in CF, it was Lilian's birthday. At the end of CF, Daniel told "EVERYONE" the camp is FREE! and it will be in PD, to your shock 29 to 31 May.
23 May
Oh toot! Meeting on 29 and 30. Camp is off my mind. Have to call them to cut my name off the list. Eh? Why can't I reach anybody?!
26 May
Again in the office. "Kar Wai, are you going to the retreat?" I shoke "Why not?! I've already book your place and paid for your deposit." (Was she asking whether I'm going or telling me that I'm going?!) "Huh?! Wah! Ok-lah, I'm going!"
This involves money you know? As a responsible MAN, I have to go!
Matthew 19:27 "We have left everything to follow you! What then will there be for us?"
29 May
1 a.m
Revelation, so this is indeed a leadership training camp. Can I, am I able to be a Christian leader? Come on, I have twisted faith, twisted philosophy and twisted me! Oh God, you must be kidding!
2 a.m.
ZzzzZZz
6 a.m.
Felt reluctant. Wearing those blue appaulets are burdening. and so does the works. I've never rested since then. Running here and there, doing this and that. I'm so tired, but I have to keep myself strong.
1.30 p.m.
Departure. Sleep....
*****************************************************************************************
I really didn't expect all these. It was spontaneous. I only had a backpack. 3 sets of clothings, toothbrush, a pair of shoes and me! RM150 with bed, pillow and 6 MEALS a day! This is, man! Luxurious!
Throughout the camp, I was loud, boastful because something drove me to take over and to be recognised. Until that I even said something that I wouldn't normally speak!
I wanted to protect myself, I wanted to be recognised, so no one can ever hurt me again.
Have you ever feel that you're completely broke down and yet you feel so uplifted?
Why do I have to live up to other's expectation? Why do I need to put on stronghold within myself? Why do I trust only in myself?
I have limited strength and ability, many things are impossible for me, yet I did it on my own and failed miserably.
I don't have to be. I always say I'm a leader, I should not show any weakness. But yet, I'm the weakest. I thought I'm a good leader, the truth is, I'm the worst. Who said so? God says so!
As a leader, I did not leave any legacy because I did everything on my own. I didn't trust anybody. Which makes me feel sorry for Alvin for he struggled through his time as my succesor.
*****************************************************************************************
This camp was more than what I can ever expect. I spent 3 digits in my saving account but I gained lessons of my life! Transformed me completely!
I thank God for everything, for His timing, for His amazing plan. I'm before His presence again!
*****************************************************************************************
O Father in Heaven, I can't praise You even more O Father. Thank You for Your mercy and grace, thank You for blessing me with such wonderful people around me, thank You for bringing me back to You LORD, thank You for putting me through all these and thank You for proving me wrong! Father keep me strong in faith, keep me alert and watch against the evils O Father. I pray in Jesus name that You will gaurd us Father and protect us, for we are vulnerable as we gave up our stronghold and completely trust in You O Father. Arm us O Father and we are ready as your warriors O Father. Calm the storms O Father, as we start fishing people O my LORD!
Help those who are weak O Father, give them glory. Save those who are humble, let them shine O Father.
Help me in my path O Father, that the path I walk I walk in Jesus O Father! I love You Abah!
In Jesus' amazing name, Amen!
Job 6:24:"Teach me, and I will be quiet; show me where I have been wrong."
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